Nobody despises that shrew known as Kate Gosselin more than I do. In fact, I pretty much hate her. But even I feel sorry for her about now. Since when does swatting your kid on the butt for being disobedient make you a child-abusing monster? I know I've covered this in my blog before but, frankly, I'm so confused. Did I miss something? Is spanking illegal in this country? If so, then I know a lot of people who break that law, including myself.
Here's the thing. There is a HUGE difference between spanking a child and beating a child. Just like there's a difference between denying a child a snack as punishment and denying a child nourishment for the entire day as punishment. So Kate smacked her kid. Big fucking deal. I'm more worried about the fact that she allows cameras in her home to film her children in their most vulnerable moments (potty training, etc) for cold, hard cash. But that's a blog for another day. Does anybody really like punishing their children? It is the suckiest part about being a parent. I'm terrible at discipline. But there are days when my daughter is practically begging for it and I must oblige her. Trust me when I say I try to use all methods in my arsenal, time-outs, take away toys, scolding. Sometimes a smack is the only thing that works.
Is it really that out of the realm of normal to swat a child? Is it just me and my friends that practice this form of punishment here and there? I'd really, really like to know that I, myself, am not some sort of child abusing monster for dispensing loving discipline to my daughter when she acts like a defiant brat. Well, maybe I am. Just one more thing for me to feel guilty about.
1 day ago
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I think most people smack their kids. Not everyone, but most.
ReplyDeleteI think most people act appalled when they see a kid get smacked. These are the same people who are appalled when you don't smack your kid when they are being bratty.
Waterboarding is much more effective than spanking.
ReplyDeleteThe few times I have spanked my son he just kind of smirked and told me it didn't hurt so I must be doing it wrong.
Or I should work out my biceps more.
Growing up, my father spanked me quite regularly. Belts. Switches. Rulers. And there was the occasional cold cock across the face.
ReplyDeleteWhen my kids were very young, sometimes a tap on the ass could speak volumes. But it never felt right. I constantly had to check myself: Am I doing this while in control, or am I pissed off?
There's a fine line, and I've decided not to approach it as they've grown older . . .
I saw that story and I had to laugh. If that's "abuse" then there are more abusive parents out there than not.
ReplyDeleteThank you, people. I'm seriously looking over my shoulder now waiting for someone to take my kid away. It's bullshit.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I don't get it either. I always thought judicious well-intentioned spanking was good for a kid. Only until the kid is a kid, though.
ReplyDeleteI read the first few comments left on the article you linked and it seems most think the writer is a moron. I liked the one comment. Your parents spanked you once as a kid and you never recovered??? Grow up. Seriously I second that!
ReplyDeleteI think I commented about this topic here before, but I don't spank, hit, swat, whatever you want to call it. Personally, I disagree with the practice, as it teaches that the final solution is physical violence or aggression. (To your kid, you are hitting them, whatever amount of force you used.)
ReplyDeleteHowever, with that being said, other parents have the right to parent how they see fit. I agree there is a difference between spanking and abuse; I just fear that some parents may miss the line between the two when emotions run high.
Bottom line, I don't agree with what you're doing, but you're not a monster either.
I am not a spanker, either. But as much as I don't like what that family does (ie - put their kids on tv for moolah, like the Duggers, like any of them) I cannot believe there is even a debate here! Half of America believes in the spare-the-rod mentality. Cut me a break folks.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if my kids are gonna get taken away because I let them walk out barefoot, we don't take baths every day and sometimes they get pancakes for breakfast?
I dont hit my son. Ever. To each his own though.
ReplyDeleteI don't know who Kate Gosselin is. As for spanking, I don't have a problem with it as long as one doesn't cross that line. If one doesn't know what that line is then one is a moron who shouldn't have kids.
ReplyDeleteI also think that people should spend more time minding their own business.
I thought that was kind of ridiculous, too. I don't like spanking, but I don't see a real problem with it, either. Well, let me amend that. One or two quick swats on the butt? Fine. Over the knee paddling? That flips a switch for me.
ReplyDeleteI would never, EVER, spank my child. I have to wonder if you and the other mothers who hit their kids would mind if your husbands smacked you too if they felt you were out of order. Why is it illegal to smack a spouse, but not a child? And just because people used to do it in the past means nothing. Slavery was once the norm too, but should we still be running around now shackling every negro we see? Some things should change. And if you can't control your child without hitting them, you have very little imagination. I suppose for you and the other moms on here it's a "do as I say, not as I do" approach as you're all obviously the lazy and unintellectual lumpen (you may have to look that word up), but it's completely, totally and utterly illogical and, frankly, now that I know you spank your kids I will never read your blog again as you disgust me. A pox upon your house and those of your moronic, hillbilly, white trash friends.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous - Interesting perspective. Truth be told, I wouldn't want a person who wishes a "pox upon [my] house]" to read my blog anyway. It makes me curious that you should condemn me for a brand of discipline (which I use very rarely), while you feel comfortable wishing a viral disease upon my family and friends. I think it's moronic to compare the enslavement of human beings to a mild smack upon the rear of a recalcitrant child. It seems quite a leap in logic there. I am not a perfect parent, nor do I claim to be.
ReplyDeleteGypsy - I completely agree. I'm talking about a swat or two, nothing more.
ReplyDeleteI like what CheekofGod said and I've never been in the position but can imagine I would feel the same way, not knowing if it was anger driven or really about discipline.
ReplyDelete